Sssssssssssssssssssss-mokin!

The Smoking Gun is great. I should really check it out more. Someone pointed me to this tonight, which is an extensive list of "riders" for bands, comedians, entertainers in general. Quite eye-opening, really. Personally, I find the food that they request most interesting. Britney herself (not her band, not her people, just Britney) requires quite a list of food and drink, including both Cool Ranch and WOW! Doritos. Aren't those the ones with the stuff that makes your butt leak? I also like the fact that her band requires a large bucket of mixed KFC chicken delivered at 4pm. I'm realizing more and more that being a runner at one of these venues where these bands play would really suck.

My favorite one? Busta Rhymes. Particularly this paragraph:

"Busta prefers West Indian and African American (Soul). In other words they should receive well rounded meals with fixins! Busta's management has final approval on all caterers. There is to be no pork or beef in the food or vicinity of Busta's dressing room."

Things I like about this paragraph:

1) This professionally-drafted document refers to him simply as "Busta".
2) This professionally-drafted document uses the term "fixins".
3) Busta is referred to in the plural ("they"). He is not just one man. Busta is many men.
4) Busta apparently doesn't eat red meat or the other white meat. Who knew?

If you read on, under requirements for soundcheck Busta apparently requires 6 bottles of Moet champagne - FOR SOUNDCHECK.

The Dixies Chicks like to golf. And they're requiring someone to make a tee time for them.

I could go on and on, but that would take all the fun out of it for you. Go on, take a gander.

P.S. As you go, you realize that promoters and venues are getting all of this crap for bands, anything they want under the sun, and then passing the costs on to us, as ticket buyers. Kind of makes you feel ripped off in a way.